THEORY 5
RELIGIOUS ZEALOTRY AS POSTAL PRACTICE:

>A Chicano charismatic, Richard "El Palido" Rodriguez, had created a religious cult based on Santeria and Low Impact Aerobics. Somehow concealing his ethnicity, from his all Colorless congregation, he was able to lead this large cult of 6,000 worshipers. Based out of the old San Juan Capistrano Mission, Rodriguez led this eccentric group until its tragic end 10 years after his rise to power. "El Palido" recited to his congregation the new nativist legislatoin by the Third Plebian Parliament of United Aztlan. This legislative act institutionally, socially, artistically, politically, and economically relegated the Colorless to third class citizenry by: issuing identity cards, and by denying them access to public education, welfare, health and housing. Richard "El Palido" Rodriguez, using his renown talents as an orator and after four days of sermonizing, exhortations, and food and sleep deprivation, had convinced his congregation to cut off their left hands as a political protest and as an act of faith. Crating 6,000 plus hands, some of the disciples had decided to sever both hands as a form of religious one upmanship, Rodriguez decided to ship the steamy crate to the Aztlan Parliament in the capitol District of East Los. Weeks later it was returned to the mission due to lack of postage.

THEORY 6
GLOBAL ECONOMY AS EVOLUTIONARY CATALYST:

In 1998, Chicano scientists, politicos, medical experts, and industrialists nationwide were gravely concerned with the spreading of what was to be known as the "Fat White Hand Disease." This epidemic began in isolated pockets in the southwest where the Colorless, unaccustomed to manual labor complained of swelling and achiness in their hands. Apparently, after working full twelve hour shifts in the tomato fields of San Clemente, where this phenomena was first documented, a field hand by the name of Steven Dodd Farnsworth became the talk of the nation. His hands swelled for nearly two weeks, non-stop, until they simply dropped off. This created a great panic in the agri-business of Southern Claifas by the turn of the century. Thirteen Councils of Aztlan by removing the EIB, European Immigration Barrier. But as social prognosticators had predicted, witht he increase in European immigrants social problems increased: acutely lower scholastic test scores, increase in gangs, welfare fraud, drug abuse, rapes, murders, car thefts, burglaries, and bland and inane music permeated the land. In the Colorless pop music industry, what could be considered an anthem of sorts was written and performed by their folk hero Billy Ray Cyrus with a hit that rose to the top of the charts titled "Achy Breaky Hand."

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